Well, here we are. The first day of 3rd grade. We've been anticipating this moment for a while now. Looking at the books on the bookshelf. Talking about it. Finishing the inside of our school room.
I can't quite explain how it felt to start a new year, teaching 3rd grade. I've been pretty overwhelmed with it all for a few weeks now. I wanted to start school two weeks ago. But, our school room wasn't quite done and even though it was SO close, I made myself wait, knowing with all my heart that an area set aside for us to work and have a great sense of focus was more important than our kick-off day. And while I remained nervous that I had the ability to even teach 3rd grade, I also held onto my faith that God WAS going to provide me with exactly what I needed to get this job done.
The first day is sometimes the hardest. Just getting started. Delving into that new, unknown territory. All new books, a new teachers manual, new themes. Something that completely surprised me though, was to see some pretty serious emotion come out of Caleb. We started our day like most. I let him have about 20 minutes to "wake up." Then we had some breakfast together and after lugging two office chairs across the wet yard (drizzled this morning), we sat at our table and looked at each other. It was a "what now?" moment. I'm laughing now. But that was how I felt, not sure if Caleb recognized it or not. Then I said, "okay. let's pray." He said "okay," and he bowed his head. I told him, "i'm going to hold your hand." And I prayed.
Now. I have the sweetest little boy sometimes. I've prayed before and most of the time IF I am having an emotional prayer, he hears it in my voice and when the prayer is done, he will come over and pat me on the back or hug me to help me feel better. Well, immediately when I finished praying he came around the table. At first I thought to myself, do I sound like I'm crying? But then, HE climbed into MY lap, curled up and just cried. I tried to talk to him. I tried to ask what was wrong. But, it was like he didn't have the words. And maybe, he didn't quite know himself what all the emotion was about. Maybe his little heart and mind were having the same build-up inside of them that I was feeling and that was his way of finding release. I'm not certain. But, ten minutes later, he wiped away his tears, "shook" himself off and went back to his chair, in his PJ bottoms and t-shirt. We then went about our day.
I had a lot of expectations for today. I was concerned they were, too, high. But, I also wanted to be sure he was challenged. We spend a portion of the day reviewing and as we did, I became pretty comfortable with the fact that he didn't forget quite as much as I was worried he might have. I can only stress to you how proud of him I am. He had a lot more writing than at the end of 2nd grade. And with a few complaints, he mustered the strength to do it and get through. He did great....and I'm so proud.
As I write this, I realized my 2nd grade blogging is behind. I have high hopes of finishing it up, but with the amount of time I currently have available, it seems more relevant to stay with what we have going on right now. So, maybe I will get to that. Maybe I won't, but either way I rest in the fact that it's okay.
Educating in Christ,
Pam
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